Hard to know how we'll feel next week! The big takeaway for me with this "episode", is acceptance and letting go. Whatever happens to us, beginning at peace with our circumstances seems to me the easiest path, though it's not easy to get there! As a great sage once said, "Change no circumstances, change me!"
THIS. “I also realized that I didn’t have to convince myself that I didn’t want kids—I reminded myself that the desire was separate from the decision.”
It took me years to really fully get this idea. First I denied the desire, then I snapped into action to avoid grieving the lost years. It took me a long time to accept that that season of my life had passed; I still have a little lingering rage about losing the chance to choose. But I wouldn’t trade my current life now. I both adore being a bonus adult and breathe a sigh of relief that I get to do the fun stuff.
It’s been a long journey for you and I’m glad you’re finding some clarity.
The ending of your story surprised me, but I am happy you were able to find clarity and not jump into motherhood half-heartedly. Wishing you joy and a blessed future with your hubby. You do write very well and I enjoyed the journey.
Thanks for the candid story. I can somewhat relate to your endeavors and feel for you guys! I am now 65 and have no kids. This has never been much of an issue--just fate? I never tried as hard as you, but I can say, it is ok. I am good with my big extended family. We never know what life will throw at us. For me, it is best to feel grateful for what I DO have here and now.
Keep up the excellent writing! That can be your "baby" for now and into the future.
So happy you have each other ♥️
Hard to know how we'll feel next week! The big takeaway for me with this "episode", is acceptance and letting go. Whatever happens to us, beginning at peace with our circumstances seems to me the easiest path, though it's not easy to get there! As a great sage once said, "Change no circumstances, change me!"
THIS. “I also realized that I didn’t have to convince myself that I didn’t want kids—I reminded myself that the desire was separate from the decision.”
It took me years to really fully get this idea. First I denied the desire, then I snapped into action to avoid grieving the lost years. It took me a long time to accept that that season of my life had passed; I still have a little lingering rage about losing the chance to choose. But I wouldn’t trade my current life now. I both adore being a bonus adult and breathe a sigh of relief that I get to do the fun stuff.
It’s been a long journey for you and I’m glad you’re finding some clarity.
thanks for sharing the whole journey with us
The ending of your story surprised me, but I am happy you were able to find clarity and not jump into motherhood half-heartedly. Wishing you joy and a blessed future with your hubby. You do write very well and I enjoyed the journey.
Thanks for the candid story. I can somewhat relate to your endeavors and feel for you guys! I am now 65 and have no kids. This has never been much of an issue--just fate? I never tried as hard as you, but I can say, it is ok. I am good with my big extended family. We never know what life will throw at us. For me, it is best to feel grateful for what I DO have here and now.
Keep up the excellent writing! That can be your "baby" for now and into the future.
Wow this changes my whole perspective on writing! Thank you